Feeling curious about trying your first sex toy is completely normal. Many people—women, men, and transgender folks—use sex toys for self-care and sexual exploration. You might feel a little shy or even embarrassed, but you’re not alone.

• More women of all ages and backgrounds use sex toys than ever before.

• Sex toys can boost pleasure and help you feel better about yourself.

• Many older women enjoy using them, with lots choosing vibrators or dildos.
  You get to decide what feels right for you. Go at your own pace and treat this as a way to care for yourself. Your first time using sex toy doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s.

Key Takeaways

• Picking the right sex toy is important. Begin with simple and small choices that feel good to you. Make sure you feel cozy for your first time. Being alone and calm helps you enjoy it more. Always look at the instructions before you use a toy. It is important to know how to use it safely. Use lubricant to make things feel better. Water-based lubes are good for most toys. Clean your toy before and after you use it. This helps keep you safe and healthy.

Choosing Your First Sex Toy

Types and Features

When you look for your first sex toy, you might feel confused by all the options. There are many kinds of vibrators, dildos, and other toys. Some vibrators are small and quiet. These are good if you want privacy. Some vibrators have different speeds or patterns. You can find toys that are waterproof. You can use these in the bath or shower. Many people like rechargeable toys. You do not need to buy batteries for them.

Tip: If you want a toy that is easy to clean, pick one with a simple shape and no tiny parts.

Materials and Safety

The material of your toy is important for comfort and safety. Some materials are better for your body and last longer. Here is a quick guide:

You should choose toys made from medical-grade silicone, glass, or stainless steel. These are safe for most people and easy to clean. Do not use toys made from jelly rubber or toys that do not say what they are made of. These can break down and may not be safe for your body.

Wash silicone toys with mild soap and warm water. You can boil them to make them extra clean. Glass and stainless steel toys can go in the dishwasher. For electronic toys, use a damp cloth and toy cleaner unless they are waterproof.

Preferences and Comfort

Think about what feels good for you. Do you like soft or strong feelings? Do you want a toy for outside or inside your body? If you are new, start with a simple toy. It should not be too big or hard to use. Many beginners pick smaller vibrators or slim dildos. Reading reviews can help you learn what other people liked or did not like.

• Start with something simple and not scary.

• Know what makes you comfortable and go slow.

• Pick smaller, softer toys so you do not feel overwhelmed.

Remember, your comfort is the most important thing. Take your time and choose a toy that fits your needs and experience.

Preparing for First Time Using Sex Toy

Setting the Mood

You want your first time using sex toy to feel special and safe. The right mood can help you relax and enjoy the experience. Start by making sure you have a private space where you will not be interrupted. Lock the door or let others know you need some alone time.

Try these ideas to create a cozy atmosphere:

• Dim the lights or use soft lamps.

• Light a few scented candles for a calming smell.

• Play your favorite music or soothing sounds.

• Take a warm bath or shower before you begin.

• Set up your bed or a comfy spot with pillows and blankets.

You deserve to feel comfortable and at ease. Treat this like a solo date night or a gentle form of self-care. When you feel relaxed, it is easier to focus on what feels good for you.

Reading Instructions

Before you start using a sex toy, take a few minutes to read the instructions. Every toy is a little different, so you want to know how to use a sex toy safely and get the most out of it. The instructions will tell you how to turn it on, change settings, and clean it. They also include safety tips and warnings.

Here is a simple checklist:

• Read the user manual or guide that comes with your toy.

• Check if your toy is waterproof or only splash-proof.

• Learn how to charge or insert batteries if needed.

• Look for any special care tips or warnings.

Manufacturers write these instructions to help you avoid mistakes and keep you safe. If you ever feel unsure about how to use a sex toy, go back to the instructions. Remember, your first time using sex toy is about learning and exploring. You do not need to rush or feel pressure to get everything perfect.

It is normal if your experience does not match what you see in movies or online. Focus on what feels good for you, not on reaching a certain goal. Sometimes, you may not orgasm the first time, and that is okay. Enjoy the journey and let yourself explore.

Lube and Hygiene

Lubricant can make your first time using sex toy much more comfortable and fun. Using lube with sex toys helps reduce friction and makes everything feel smoother. Water-based lubricants work well with most toys, especially silicone ones. If you use a glass or metal toy, you can also try silicone lube, but avoid it with silicone toys to keep them in good shape.

Here is a quick guide for choosing the right lube:

Before you start, always clean your toy. Wash it with warm water and mild soap, or use a special toy cleaner. If your toy is waterproof, you can rinse it under the tap. For toys that are not waterproof, use a damp cloth. Let your toy air dry before you use it. Cleaning your toy before and after every use keeps you safe and helps your toy last longer.

• Remove batteries before cleaning if your toy has them.

• Use alcohol-free wipes or antibacterial cleaners for extra care.

• Store your toy in a clean, dry place when you finish.

Good hygiene helps prevent infections and allergic reactions. It also makes your experience more enjoyable and stress-free.

When you prepare for your first time using sex toy, remember that you are in control. Take your time, listen to your body, and do what feels right. You might want to start with a little foreplay or even masturbate with your hands before trying the toy. There is no right or wrong way to learn how to use a sex toy. The most important thing is that you feel safe, clean, and ready to explore.

First Time Using a Dildo

Start Slow

Getting started with a dildo can feel exciting and a little nerve-wracking. You might want to jump right in, but taking it slow makes your first time using a dildo much more comfortable. Many beginners start with their fingers before trying a toy. This helps you learn what kind of stimulation feels best. You can tease the outside of your vulva or anus with gentle touches. When you feel ready, use the tip of the dildo to explore. Focus on the sensitive nerve endings near the entrance. Make sure you use plenty of lube and check that you are fully aroused. If you feel dry or tense, pause and give yourself more time.

Tip: Choosing the right size matters. Many people pick a dildo that is too big or too small. Try a slim, soft toy for your first experience. Look for one with customizable features, like different vibrations or textures, to match your comfort level.

Explore Sensations

Stimulation is the key to enjoying your toy. You do not need to insert the dildo all the way. Start with shallow thrusts and see how your body reacts. You can experiment with twisting, turning, or moving the toy back and forth. Notice how different motions and vibrations feel. Some dildos offer multiple vibration settings, so try switching between them to find what you like. If you want more stimulation, combine the toy with your fingers or use it on other sensitive areas. Take breaks and pay attention to your body's signals. You might discover new kinds of pleasure with each movement.

• Begin with the tip for gentle stimulation.

• Try shallow thrusts to stimulate nerve-rich areas.

• Explore different motions and vibration patterns.

Listen to Your Body

Safely using a dildo means listening to your body every step of the way. Make sure you are well-lubricated and at least an 8 out of 10 on the arousal scale before you try penetration. If you feel any discomfort or pain, stop right away. You can always go back to teasing or external stimulation. Hydration helps if you feel sore afterward, so drink some water. After you finish, clean your toy and take a moment for self-care. Reflect on what felt good and what you might want to try next time. Remember, stimulation should never hurt. You are in control, and there is no need to rush.

Note: Many people overlook the firmness and texture of their toy. These features can change the way stimulation and vibrations feel. Try different options until you find what works for you.

Aftercare and Cleaning

Cleaning Steps

Cleaning your sex toy is one of the most important safer sex practices. You want to keep your body-safe toys fresh and ready for next time. Here’s how you can do it:

• Wash non-porous toys like silicone, glass, or stainless steel with warm water and gentle soap. You can use a special sex toy cleaner if you like.

• For porous toys, such as jelly rubber or leather, clean with mild soap and water. Don’t use too many suds.

• If your toy is waterproof and doesn’t have a motor, you can boil it for a few minutes to disinfect.

• Wipes work well for a quick clean before use. Some people use UV lights for extra protection.

• Always dry your toy completely before you put it away. Bacteria love moisture, so drying helps keep things safe.

Using gentle, unscented soap helps prevent irritation. Avoid harsh cleaners that might damage your toy and create tiny scratches where germs can hide. Cleaning before and after every use—even if you’re alone—reduces the risk of infections and keeps your safer sex practices strong.

Storage

Storing your toys the right way helps them last longer and keeps them clean. You want to protect your investment and enjoy the benefits of using a sex toy for years.

• Store toys in a cool, dry, and dark place. Avoid bathrooms because dampness can cause mold.

• Use fabric pouches for silicone toys to prevent stickiness.

• Keep glass and metal toys separate so they don’t scratch each other.

• Make sure toys are totally dry before you put them away.

• Some people use locked boxes for privacy and to keep dust out.

If your toy is dishwasher-safe, check the instructions before you try it. Good storage keeps your toys body-safe and ready for your next adventure.

Self-Care

After you finish, take a moment for yourself. Self-care is a big part of aftercare tips for dildo-users and anyone exploring new sensations.

• Drink some water and grab a snack to help your body recover.

• Wrap up in a blanket or cuddle with a pillow for comfort.

• Take a shower to relax and refresh.

• Say kind things to yourself. You deserve affirmations and positive vibes.

• If you feel tired, a nap can help you recharge.

These small acts help you feel good emotionally and physically. They also support safer sex practices by keeping you healthy and happy. Celebrate your curiosity and enjoy the benefits of using a sex toy. You’re taking care of yourself in a new way!

Remember, aftercare isn’t just about cleaning. It’s about feeling safe, relaxed, and proud of your experience.

You have done something important by trying sex toys and learning about yourself. Be proud of your curiosity and each step you take.

• Trying new things can make you feel happier and more confident.

• Liking your sexuality is a way to care for yourself.

• There is not just one way to do this—your experience is special.

If you want more help, look at these resources:

Be kind to yourself. You should have pleasure, comfort, and happiness as you learn.

FAQ

How do you choose the right vibrator for your first time?

You want a vibrator that feels comfortable and easy to use. Look for simple controls and a size that matches your comfort level. Many beginners start with a small, quiet vibrator. Reading reviews helps you learn what others like.

What should you know about how to use a vibrator safely?

Always read the instructions before you use a vibrator. Clean your vibrator before and after each use. Use water-based lube for comfort. If you feel pain, stop right away. You control the speed and pressure, so go slow and listen to your body.

Can you use a vibrator in water?

Many vibrators are waterproof, so you can use them in the bath or shower. Check the packaging to make sure your vibrator is safe for water. Never submerge a vibrator that is not waterproof. Always dry your vibrator completely before storing it.

How do you clean and store your vibrator?

Wash your vibrator with warm water and mild soap. Use a toy cleaner for extra safety. Dry your vibrator before you put it away. Store your vibrator in a clean pouch or box. Keep it in a cool, dry place to protect it.

What if you feel nervous about how to use a vibrator?

It’s normal to feel nervous. You can start by holding the vibrator and turning it on. Try using it on your arm or leg first. When you feel ready, use it on sensitive areas. Take your time and remember, you decide how to use a vibrator.